Generative Stage
Currently reading:
The Bloody Chamber by Angela Carter
Saint of the Narrows Street by William Boyle
The Writing Life by Annie Dillard
She Had Some Horses: Poems by Joy Harjo [ongoing]
Books finished this week: 2
★★★☆☆
Where this book came from: Purchased after a tour at the Emily Dickinson Museum in Amherst, Massachusetts (highly recommend a visit!)
Why this book: As far as I remember, I’ve never actually read any Dickinson. It felt wrong to leave her house and not at least promise to rectify that.
Thoughts: First, I’m counting this as part of this week’s missive because I finished reading it literally minutes after sending out the last missive. Second, I’ve given it three stars because I genuinely just think I’m not smart enough to “get” Dickinson. I liked a lot of the language, but I wasn’t as drawn to her work as I have been to other poets I’ve begun exploring over the last year. Honestly, I think I need to take a Dickinson class to fully understand how to read and appreciate her.
★★★★☆
Where this book came from: Purchased last week at the Center for Fiction
Why this book: Liz Moore’s The God of the Woods was one of my favorite books I read last year. Also, Britt (hi, Britt!) recommended this one!
Thoughts: I was engrossed in this book from page one. I am truly thrilled I finished reading the other book I had on me while out and about last week, because that meant getting to dive into this one immediately. I love when a book just grabs hold of me like that. I do have some spoiler-y gripes that I’ll keep to myself and I still prefer The God of the Woods, which is why this one is only four stars. But if you’re in the market for an unflinching look at addiction and the opioid crisis and nuanced portraits of characters and a neighborhood, pick this one up.
Library updates:
The urge to write is slowly but surely returning to my brain and my busy little fingers. Thankfully, while I wait, the urge to read has not yet abandoned me.
I definitely lost some of my writing drive and focus after finishing the first full draft of Amp back in December. And then my life kind of went all topsy-turvy, so I didn’t really notice that I wasn’t writing. Now that the fog is beginning to clear, I’ve noticed. Oh, have I noticed.
I’m finding ways to get back into it. I’m rereading old notes for old ideas that never went anywhere and getting inspired again. I’ve decided to edit and expand a short story I wrote for a class last summer. I’m maybe writing some new—and hopefully exciting—flashbacks for Amp. And I have some new ideas that I’m hoping I can make into something—specifically, short stories that someone will want to publish.
I’ve also been leaning on my slowly expanding writing community, in small ways, by spending time with writer-type and creative people and working to talk to more of those kinds of people. I spent time with friends at the Center for Fiction last Sunday, and working with other folks is always a boon, but I also enjoyed talking about what we were all reading and what we’d found helpful. Those conversations reminded me that I love reading about writing, and that it had been awhile since I returned to that well, so I started reading The Writing Life.
In fact, I’m finding a lot of motivation—and encouragement—from the books I’m currently reading. I feel inspired and supported by both Joy Harjo and Annie Dillard, and I found myself entirely enamored with the introduction Kelly Link wrote for The Bloody Chamber. I’m finding teachers and mentors wherever I look: the books I’m reading, the friends I have, my own journaling.
This week, I also had two absolutely wonderful introductory meetings with student editors at Emerson, both of whom will be reading the latest version of Amp and giving me their feedback in coming weeks. I know it will be a challenge to collate all the notes I receive this semester, but I want this book to be as strong as possible by the time I graduate, so I’m glad to have the opportunity to collect all these treasures from a variety of sources. I feel a bit adrift. But I also feel confident that I’m finding my way back.
And now, a word on grief. Moneypenny’s birthday (or, more specifically, the day I assigned to her as a day to celebrate her birth) was this past Monday. I had been dreading the day for weeks, since she passed. But then I woke up on the actual day and, honestly, for a little while, I forgot all about it. Then I remembered, and I was okay. And then I wasn’t okay. So I had a quiet afternoon and evening and let myself do whatever I wanted or needed to do, because grief if fucking awful and stupid, and it comes and goes, and I’m still learning to live with it as best I can.
Closing thoughts:
Drift until you feel ready to drop anchor again.
Total books read from the Moratorium Library: 128
(Total books added to the Moratorium Library: 247)
Pre-ordered a copy of William Boyle’s latest from Kew & Willow and picked it up this week! I’m counting it towards the overall purchase count, out of an urge to be transparent, but I did edit three of his books while working at Pegasus, so should this really count?? (It should, yes.)
