Revision
Currently reading:
Long Bright River by Liz Moore
The Poetry of Emily Dickinson by Emily Dickinson [ongoing]
Books finished this week: 2
★★★★☆
Where this book came from: Greenlight, literally last week
Why this book: So, I saw this on a display table and was immediately drawn to the title and cover. I’m trying to walk more in 2025 and I love having a reason to do things that are good for me.
Thoughts: I usually take notes on my phone as I’m reading Library books, but I was just totally engrossed in understanding (and highlighting) A Philosophy of Walking. Though I didn’t agree with everything Gros had to say——yeah, it would be great to leave everything behind and walk for days on end, but most people can’t really do that——I was actually, truly inspired to incorporate more walking into my life. One of my goals for the new year was the vague “walk more,” and this book helped give me reasons why: to disconnect, to help me think, to unstick ideas and emotions. I’m not a philosophy girlie, so I was a little worried about the content before I started reading, but this was actually very easy to read and digest. I’m not sure I’ll be embarking on any weeks-long walking trips anytime soon, but this book has made me commit to walking at least once a day, and whenever the chance arises.
★★☆☆☆
Where this book came from: I got an ARC from the publisher, but then also accidentally purchased a copy from Community Bookstore, because my library is becoming truly untenable. (I gave that purchased copy to Bendy while she was here——hi, Bendy. Sorry I gave you a bad book!)
Why this book: From the cover and description, I assumed this was going to be a weird, spooky collection of stories
Thoughts: In my opinion, this was not that!! Overall, the vibes are not as spooky and surreal as the copy leads you to believe. The story descriptions on the back of the book sound like jumping-off points, but they're pretty much . . . just the entire story. Every story feels like it ends just as it's ramping up, going out with a whimper when it seemed to be leading somewhere fascinating. It’s clearly meant to be a feminist text, but the messages aren’t unique or thought-provoking. As I wrote in my Goodreads review, I gave it two stars: the first because something kept me reading, the second for the story “Reaper Ranch,” which had the strongest emotional writing, in my opinion, and was the first truly compelling story, but which fizzled at the end, just like all the others.
Library updates:
I noticed this week that some tulips started pushing their way through the soil of one of the planters on my balcony. It looks like there are fresh, green buds on my daisy bush too. I was out on the balcony on Wednesday, when it was unseasonably warm(ish), and I felt so happy to see life returning, and then immediately began to worry——I hope they all make it through the cold weather that will undoubtedly come back. I’m rooting for them.
I have change on the brain these days. Life cycles and changing seasons, sure, but mostly editing-related. Thesis semester has officially begun, and after a really encouraging and exciting feedback session on my initial pages, I got some, to be honest, tough notes on my second batch of work. Truthfully, it hurt. Reading through those notes made me feel incredibly fragile, and I started second-guessing myself, this project, and everything I’m hoping to do with my life.
But once I sat down to really absorb the notes and think about how to incorporate them, rather than skimming the headlines and feeling like a failure, I started to feel a bit better, and I think I had a good conversation with my advisor later that day. I’ve been in workshops the last two years, sure, but taking this kind of critique, on something that means so much to me is fucking hard. I’m almost glad I was reminded of that so early in the game, so I can take future notes in stride.
It’s tough to realize you have to put in a ton more work into something you already worked so hard on. The thing you realize as you get closer to the publishing world is that writing the book is just step one. It’s an accomplishment to be celebrated, for sure, but there is so much more work that comes after. I knew that, academically; for a decade, I’ve been the one giving authors new marching orders. It’s very different to be the one on the receiving end. I think part of me also assumed this semester would be a breeze. I wrote the book, so I just need to polish it up and submit my pages to graduate——simple. That was so, so dumb. Of course, this semester is going to entail a lot of work. But that’s literally why I left my job: to focus on that work. I want to devote my time and energy to what matters, and right now, what matters most is making this book as strong as I can.
I’ve also decided to revise (see what I did there?) my reading list, as you can see above. I finished those two books, started reading a new one, and officially decided to DNF——or “pause,” as I’m thinking about it for now——The Spy and I. It was a fun little book and the perfect little dose of nonsense I needed in a tough time, but I’ve found myself picking up so many other books, so it felt like time to set her aside. I’m holding onto it for now, to see if the mood strikes to come back to it eventually. I currently have five other books I’ve paused for assorted reasons on my nightstand, and I plan to return to those, too——well, to three of the five.
This has been a good reminder that reading is a hobby; it’s meant to be fun. No point wasting time on something that isn’t working for you.
Closing thoughts:
It’s going to take work, whatever you’re building for yourself. But the work will be worth it.
Total books read from the Moratorium Library: 126
(Total books added to the Moratorium Library: 246)
I found myself at the Center for Fiction and got myself a lil treat<3
